a.k.a. "The Shortest 45 minutes of Gatecon"

(skip ahead past the shallow stuff)

The six fans who'd won the auction assembled in the lobby to await Christopher Judge's arrival. He was later than the organizers had hoped for so they were busily hurrying us along into the hotel bar (Bartini's). We’d been told that Chris had arrived but I didn't spot him until we got to the hall, where he was smiling and greeting everyone. I trailed along behind him for a short bit, observing.

First impressions? He's shorter than I expected and very nicely muscled. I guess that Teal'c is such a looming presence on television that I'd expected Chris to be about 6' 4" and sporting an intimidating set of muscles.  I'd guess he's closer to 6' tall but whatever his true height, it's in perfect proportion to his musculature. He was wearing a baseball cap, which seems to be de rigueur for the actors at conventions these days. It's a choice I dislike since it makes it hard to enjoy their eyes.

Chris stopped to greet some excited fans so I hustled past him and into the area set aside for the lunch. They had lined up four rounds that normally serve as small bar tables, with chairs running down each side and one at the figurative "head" of the row. I assumed that Chris, as guest of honor, would sit down at the head. The two chairs on either side were already taken so I crossed to the back and took the next available seat. It had a great view of the head of the table so I was quite pleased with it.

Thus, I was very happy when Chris sat down in the empty seat directly across from me. I had a fabulous view of the man for the entire lunch! No hardship there, I assure you. His seat choice was a good one - for more than just me, that is - as it meant nobody was more than two spots away from his. I think everyone had a nice view. In a totally shallow, fangirl moment that I can only ascribe to hormones, I noted that I was the lucky fan who got to share the tiny table with him.

As an aside, this was my first ever experience meeting people I'd previously only seen on TV or in promo pictures. One revelation for me is that most of the people are more attractive in real life than on camera. I'd always assumed that lighting, camera angles, and expert makeup helped to embellish their good looks but the truth is that live they are stunning. There's something about their being three-dimensional that just makes them so much more. Christopher Judge is a prime example.

Yes, he's good-looking on television and I was quite aware of that. Truthfully, though, I'd bid on lunch with him because of his ebullient personality on the "Behind-the-Scenes" features on the Stargate DVDs. He just seemed like a fun person to meet and I figured lunch would be 45 minutes of laughter and good company. So I was more than pleasantly surprised to find that I was seated across the table from a man of good cheer who was not just good-looking but gorgeous. It was an unlooked-for but much-appreciated bonus.

On TV, his "body that makes the very gods themselves despair" and expressive face are obvious, but I'd never seen his killer eyelashes: long, thick, and sexy, his beautiful cheekbones when he smiles, his lively eyes, or his naughty boy charm. Of course, that's partially because Teal'c lacks the latter two. There's a magic to meeting him live that I can't properly pin down in words. My best attempt is that he's the sort of man who makes you aware of being a woman. The sort where, when he passes you on the street, you get chills as he approaches and absolutely must turn around afterwards to know whether he's just as appealing from the back. (This is very much the case.)

And he's fit. Okay, I knew that beforehand, but I mean he's fit in a way that makes a girl hungry. He smiled for almost the entire lunch. And that laugh? Infectious, good-humored...*sigh*

The decision for Teal'c to be stoic was correct for the character but it's a damned crime that we've been denied seven years of that glorious smile and laugh. Um, yeah, so by now you've gotten the idea that I think Christopher Judge is an attractive sort of guy. Enough wallowing in the shallows. As my friend JL has noted, "he bears a striking resemblance to perfection." He is a scrumptious man but I've met plenty of those and it's all a waste without a pleasing personality and an engaged brain. Happily, the discussion was just as pleasant as the scenery.

Part way into lunch, Teryl Rothery's grandmother joined us. She and Chris seemed to know each other and she sat down at the unoccupied head of the table. I wish that we'd had more time - or that the panel after the lunch had been anything other than The Big Three - because I would love to have spoken with her and gotten to know her a bit. As it was, I'm sorry to admit that I was focused on what Chris had to say and then rushed away since I knew I'd have a lousy seat for the panel as it was. As a result, I never did meet her and I regret the lost opportunity.

Chris came across as self-effacing, going out of his way to tell us about how inept he was with computers, and generally turned aside offered compliments. Not to say that he is unaware of his charm--it was fun to watch him use it on the very attractive waitress assigned to us. He was flirty as he asked her if it was "okay" for him to have a beer and, on getting her assurance that it was, he used his wiles to get her to bring him two. I don't know if it was a conscious choice on his part or if it's second nature for him, but it was fun to watch him work her. He's adept at using his skills to get what he wants.

He spoke frequently and easily about his kids. He's clearly involved with them and they mean a lot to him. It sounds as if the household Playstation 2 gets a good workout; it seems to be a central meeting ground for him and his kids. When he invites his son to play a game of basketball these days, his son heads first to the Playstation. The first time it happened, Chris clarified that he meant "go outside and play the game for real," to which his son responded that the Playstation was more "realistic." He found that, on reflection, he couldn't disagree. He's such an avid player that he is on the local gaming store's call list for new games. [For those similarly addicted to Playstation 2, Chris recently acquired "Athens 2004" and gives it rave reviews. He says it's, "just like being there." I'm presuming it's an Olympics-related game.]

One of the women at the lunch was wearing a homemade Stargate t-shirt. She'd dressed up her own kids and young nephews in SG-1 type clothes, dropped the picture over a Stargate puddle graphic, and labeled it, "Stargate: The Next Generation." Chris loved it; she gave it to him after the panel and he wore it for all the photos with fans that night. She had recently returned from Kenya and presented him with a bush hat, which he promptly tried on and elicited feedback from us on how he should wear it.

Did I mention that he's good at flirting?

Chris said that he enjoyed the spate of conventions he's been attending (though what could the poor man say when sitting at a convention, at a table with six people who had paid money to meet him??), mentioning how much fun the European tour in particular had been, and that he "and Shanks" were considering doing a "farewell tour" at the end of the season.

We asked about the possibilities of a ninth season and he said that he's heard rumors but that actors are literally the last to know. In fact, he said the cast found out about the eighth season on stage at a con when the attendees congratulated them on the show's renewal. MGM had issued a press release announcing it without telling the actors! I noted that it must make it hard to line up the next gig and he agreed. He'd been involved as a recurring character on a series towards the end of a season and was making plans during the hiatus for how he wanted to play his character in the next season when he read in the paper that the series was cancelled. He never got a call informing him.

When asked about projects he has planned for after Stargate ends and what sort of goals he has as an actor, he immediately disclaimed credentials as an actor. Given the company he keeps at work, he didn't think he ranked as an "actor." He said his goals were to gain 100 pounds and to take time off for important things like coaching his son's football team. When we laughed at his weight joke, he asserted that he's tired of working out and starving all the time.

Given what an excellent specimen of man he is, I discounted his claim. It's damned difficult to get it back after losing fitness. At a later discussion, though, Don Davis mentioned that Chris is actually a 400 pound man living inside that gorgeous body and that he didn't know of anyone who worked as hard as Chris in maintaining his physique, so I guess Chris is pretty serious about that plan.

At lunch, he ate a single, unadorned hamburger patty. I can only imagine how boring and depressing such a diet must be. Of course, he also drank 6 or more beers between the lunch and the great number of onstage beers he and Michael consumed, so I can see where he has to limit food to keep from gaining weight.

I couldn't resist asking him about one of my all-time favorite episodes, "Changeling." He was typically modest, simply thanking me when I told him that I thought it was a brilliant story and then went on to talk about writing that episode and writing in general.

He wrote Changeling to fulfill some goals of his: he wanted to ride a fire truck, work with Michael Shanks, and bring back as many past actors as possible. He felt that Teal'c was the sort of man who wanted to fit in with those around him and so he explored the life that Teal'c might have built for himself if he were from Earth. He was actually working on "Birthright" to submit for Season 6 when the entire story of Changeling, down to how it would play out in each of the scenes, came to him all at once. He locked himself in his room with his computer and wrote it down all in one go.

He said that he has to write things all in one sitting. He must lock the door and tell the kids not to disturb him because he has little self-discipline. He can't sit down to write, take a break, and then get back to it. He'll end up playing on the Playstation 2 with his kids instead of writing. So he locks himself in the room and writes until he's finished. He doesn't obsess over scripts once they're written. He has an intensive burst of creativity and then puts it behind him. He doesn't revisit them to tinker, which fits perfectly with my impression of a man who enjoys living in the here and now.

He said that it's not unusual for a story to pop into his head in its entirety but that he has to capture it immediately because otherwise he'll lose it. To that end, he has found that Post-It Notes are inadequate to his need to jot down ideas and he has painted the walls of his writing room with chalkboard paint so he can scribble whatever he needs, whenever.

He went to great pains to tell us how uncomfortable he is with computers. He wrote his first script entirely by hand because he didn't trust the computer. He had scriptwriting software but the learning curve was daunting. He just wanted to sit down and type as if he were at a typewriter. He has since found something that works for him and has been writing using the computer, though he seems to have, at best, an uneasy truce with it. He mentioned that it seems to break every time he touches it or installs software.

As an extension, he is not conversant with the internet or e-mail. He has received e-mail but not successfully sent one yet. He told us a little more detail about how he recently learned the meaning of "www" in internet addresses. A fan brought a CD he recorded a long time ago and has been trying to bury ever since for his autograph a couple of weeks prior. He'd been shocked that she had it and even more amazed that she'd recently purchased it from Asia. She'd commented that the "www" did stand for "world wide web" -- but that was news to him.

I'm guessing that helps to explain his curious absence online. Finding good information about or even good pictures of him is difficult, at best. His IMDB listing appears to be incomplete. I tried to find the cancelled series where he'd been added as a regular that he mentioned during lunch since I couldn't remember its name but couldn't find it.

He gives off the impression of being a happy go lucky sort of guy who prefers to have someone else track details. He said that he had been sitting around that very morning (playing on the Playstation with the kids, wouldn't you know?) when his agent called to remind him that he was scheduled to attend Gatecon that day. He said that was a good thing because he'd had it in mind that he was supposed to show up on Sunday. He'd have shown up and wondered why everyone was so angry with him.

When asked if he was going to return the next day for autographs, he was confused, saying he thought those were to happen that day. He was unaware that the first day was pictures and the second autographs. I had wondered how much attention the actors, writers, and so on paid to Gatecon. I guess that sort of puts the whole 'gaggle of fans descending on your city because they love you and your show' into perspective, no?

He had no idea whether he was returning the next day. (He didn't.) He had no idea that his lunch had been pre-ordered as part of the arrangements and spent some time being adorable as he played up his confusion. I saw him do that several times in the session that followed so I think it's a shtick that he enjoys. He said that early in life someone had told him, "it's better that you don't worry about it" and he'd taken it to heart.

I expressed how happy I was for Teal'c to have grown hair because I liked it as part of the change I was seeing in Teal'c. It was great to see him begin to smile more and to have more lines. I don't want Teal'c to be wallpaper. True to form, he deflected the comment by noting that he'd forgotten how much hard work it was to memorize all those lines. Yeah, right, Chris.

The one thing I was seeing in spoilers for the upcoming season that I was dubious about was the focus more on the very personal lives of the team members. I like tantalizing little glimpses but I admitted to skepticism about a whole episode dealing with Teal'c getting an apartment. There are so many cool storylines relevant to larger story arcs that I'm far more interested in: an unresolved Jaffa rebellion that we know nothing about since the disintegration of the alliance, the ongoing struggle within Teal'c as his loyalties are torn between the Tau'ri and the Jaffa rebellion, the goa'uld Camulus seeking refuge at the SGC, Daniel's time ascended...

I can't remember his entire response but he assured me it wasn't the "picking out curtains" episode that I feared it would be. Rather, it was an outgrowth of years of backstage discussions about what kind of place Teal'c would have. I'm still dubious but perhaps slightly more hopeful since he didn't seem to think it was as completely off topic as it had sounded. Perhaps the apartment will give us insights into Teal'c since some actual thought has gone into how his home would reflect who he is.

Someone asked about whether he was going to be submitting Atlantis scripts and he said that he was. In fact, he was due to pitch some story ideas in two days and he was panicking because he didn't have anything prepared. He said that 'Shanks' knew how nervous he was so he'd given him a great idea that very morning. It involved mermaids...at which point the women at the table rolled our eyes and snickered. Chris interrupted himself to ask "what?" and we just said, "it must be a man thing." He defended it, saying, "no, it's a great idea!" and we groaned knowingly.  (All in good fun, I assure you.  The entire tone of the lunch was fun and joking around.)  In retrospect, I'm sorry we gave him grief over it because at that point the antsy organizers whose job it was to keep the guests on schedule, broke in and we never DID hear what Michael's idea was.

He brushed off the woman who came to tell him time was up the first time she approached him about leaving so we got out our cameras and items to be autographed. I took a couple of photos for others before the favor was returned. I didn't want to hog him or delay the big panel talk so I just got a single picture and two autographs. I knew I'd get real pictures with Chris that evening (hah! what a crock!) and hoped that his agent would be calling him the next morning to remind him to return for autographs (sadly, no).

I had purchased a print of Leah's cartoon entitled, "Dream Team" that I was hoping to get signed by all the primary actors. Chris kindly personalized it for me and also signed a way cool photo I'd gotten in the Dealer's Room: Chris dressed as Teal'c but with a smiling laugh that is entirely his own. He commented that he hadn't seen the cartoon before and said that he was especially fond of some erotic art involving Sam and Janet he'd seen one time when a fan had brought it for signatures. He'd found it erotic and...memorable. I'm glad I didn't see the expression on Teryl's grandmother's face at that one.

Chris balked at leaving even the second time he was prodded - I'd go so far as to say he pouted slightly - since he was still working on his second beer but cheered up when assured they'd give him a fresh beer onstage. He knows how to work those charms, all right.

With that, it was time to say our goodbyes and rush to find a seat in the auditorium. I'm still bummed about how bad my view was for the panel of the Big Three. It was the only time any of them appeared on stage during the con but I wouldn't have missed that time with Chris for anything. He seems to be very happy at home, content spending time there with his girlfriend and his kids. He came off exactly as he does in the Stargate Lowdown from Season 7: irreverent, naturally funny, charming, friendly, gorgeous, hot, and sexy as hell.

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